FJ's Verdict:

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Product Name: Armageddon (Fruit Punch)
Company: StarChem Labs
MSRP: $69.99
Availability: High (Stores & Online)
Servings: 40

When it comes to pre-workout products that claim to give you “SKIN BUSTING” pumps and vascularity and all that hyped up shit, I always turn to the ingredient list. And yup, sure enough, it’s all about L-Arganine. This is supposed to be the key ingredient and the pre-cursor to Nitric Oxide, but a LOT of studies have proven otherwise. For L-Arganine to really deliver anything remotely noticeable,  you’d would need to take in over 15g+ a day… Which is a LOT, and even then some say there is no hard evidence to prove that L-Arganine will give you the pumps you need.

My opinion on L-Arganine is mixed. Combined with the right ingredients I think it MAY be able to give you a decent pump, but again I need PROOF, and from personal tests so far… I’ve been let down.

Enter StarChem labs with Armageddon. This supplement is supposed to work 400% better than normal AAKG (arginine alphaketoglutarate) and was clinically proven by a “well reputable and independent research lab”. Funny, because they never mention who these “reputable” people are. But still, I decided to give StarChem Labs the benefit of the doubt.

Product Claims: Words from the horse’s mouth…

Lay Waste to the competition with ARMAGEDDON, the most advanced and awe-inspiring hypertrophic pre-workout formula ever created. Experience immediate and noticeable increases in muscle density, hardness, and strength virtually instantaneously upon ingesting this truly remarkable compound. Users and observers alike will notice immediate and sustained massive body pumps to the absolute brink of feasibility, with dramatic python-like vascularity, and a wicked skin-thinning effect never before seen in an over-the-counter product. ARMAGEDDON represents the New World Order in advanced sports nutrition as it relates to bodybuilding and athletic performance and is the 1st and only product to date whose results can truly be described as those of Biblical proportion. Just 1 dose and you will know why ARMAGEDDON spells Judgment Day for any and all competition, and the end of the supplement world as we currently know it.

• Armageddon is the absolute outer limits of non-hormonal lean mass augmentation
• Notice immediate and sustained full body pumps.
• Dramatically increases vascularity
• Specially formulated skin thinning technology
• Dramatic increases in muscle size and strength
• Explosive performance gains and sustained training capacity
• Amazing taste, no need to force it down like the competition

Real World Results:

OK, so where do I even start? How about the product itself? This thing is supposed to be a powder that you mix with water/juice or your favourite beverage, but that’s ONLY if you manage to break the big lump of crap that you get in the bottle! Literally, like I understand when it says “some clumping may occur” but this stuff was ROCK HARD. It was like trying to scrape concrete… It broke my fork! Those bitches! StarChem Labs… You morons owe me a fork!

Moving on, I decided to see if anyone else had this problem because there was a possibility that I ended up with an unlucky batch. Nope, it aint me, its the product. Check out this hilarious video from another user:

That video basically sums up the review right there, but I got curious and after some diligent effort, I DID manage to get enough powder to fill a scoop, mixed it with some OJ and threw it back. This garbage doesn’t live up to ANY of it’s claims, and is the WORST tasting supplement I’ve ever come across. I had an initial rush of energy that lasted 15 minutes, followed by this weird “heightened” state. I can’t really describe it but I felt a bit more focused… Which isn’t a bad thing. Then things went from OK to HORRIBLE. I got a sick feeling in my stomach that was conveniently followed by an annoying headache.

And you KNOW I don’t get headaches often. This totally compromised my workout… I tried to man up and hustle through it but half way in I couldn’t take it anymore. I left the gym totally pissed-the-fuck-off. A slightly un-wise move on my part, I mean I knew it was bad but for the sake of the review I decided to try this crap. UGH. The things I do…

Conclusion:

It tastes like shit, smells like cough syrup & goat spit, gives you headaches, makes your stomach feel like it’s going to implode, comes in a brick form and costs $69. I think if you are a person that is WAY TOO HAPPY for your own good, it’s time you picked up some Armageddon from StarChem labs. You need to live life and feel like shit sometimes… Right?

I’m done with this laughable attempt at a supplement. Don’t be surprised if StarChem goes out of business anytime soon… With a product like this I wouldn’t expect them to stick around for very long.

- Fit Jerk